The pressure to stay in, when you want to be out

This is a topic that I haven’t really spoken much about, nor have I seen anyone else touch on the subject.

Speaking entirely from my own experiences, and whether this is a testament to who I have in my life compared to others, I am not quite sure.

When I made the decision to leave escorting and content creation, I was expecting to get an encouraging response from those who knew what industry I was in. Whilst most people did give me that, what really caught me by surprise was the number of people who tried to keep me from leaving at all.

Now, these people aren’t your average horny male friends by any stretch, in fact quite the opposite. Corporate associates that didn’t have any financial interest in my business but were quite aware of how lucrative it was for me. These people took it upon themselves to tell me that I was “making a mistake” and “why cap your potential when you have come this far”. These sorts of comments felt strange as I have had Wild Ruby under my wing and growing since 2020, which still leaves me very involved in the industry as a whole- but apparently that didn’t draw the appeal as the other work did.

I felt like I was constantly defending my choices, almost like I couldn’t be trusted to make a sound decision. Overall, in person sex work and content creation became a drain to me, whilst right up until I left it was paying a wonderful amount, it certainly didn’t come without sacrifice. I have a young child, and every weekend I found myself exhausted and unable to spend quality time with him as I had to work. Weekdays were for his education, so it really didn’t leave much time for us. I knew that sex work was never going to be forever as my weekends, and what also became weeknights were becoming consumed with work. Something had to give. I had to prioritise my family, my mental health, and my overall physical health. Anyone who has children or has been around young children knows just how challenging they can be, and then when you couple that with no sleep and the physical labours of going out and having sex/emotionally draining interactions (and driving a car!), it felt like an accident waiting to happen.

Regardless of my choices, the people telling me to stay in the industry, to keep making bank, and to just do it for another 6 months so you can save another “x” amount of money, I realised very quickly were not on my team at all. Whilst they could have had some good intentions, I don’t think there is anything worse than encouraging someone to stay in the sex industry when they have expressed a deep desire to leave. It feels predatory.

For those who care to wonder, those people are no longer in my life in any capacity. I have changed so many facets of my personal and professional life since leaving officially in January. I have a whole new professional team behind me, and we are continuing to kick goals, albeit a little slower. Progress is progress and I am so damn proud of how far I have come since then.

If you think you have more to offer in life, and you are sitting on the fence and not knowing when the right time is to take the plunge, just do it. You initiate the sink or swim mentality, and you are 10x more likely to succeed if you feel like you have no other options.

Highly recommend.

Keep your submissions coming!